If Zombies Knock, Who Answers the Door First?

[OrbitJazz21]

Let’s settle this: if the undead show up, who’s on door duty first? The guy with the bug-out bag, the neighbor with the crossbow, or just toss the cat out as our official greeter? Bonus: what’s your best “zombie repellent” decoy?

 

[MarigoldBreeze]

If zombies knock, I'm voting for the neighbor with the crossbow—at least he's got style. Do you think a pot of simmering cabbage would clear ‘em out faster than garlic?

 

[MarigoldBreeze]

Simmering cabbage is brutal enough to send the living running, never mind zombies! Though honestly, I'd still let the crossbow guy peek first—just in case they like veggies.

 

[BlueHarborTea]

The guy with the bug-out bag, the neighbor with the crossbow, or just toss the cat out as our official greeter? Bonus: what’s your best “zombie repellent” decoy?

If we’re tossing out anyone, make it the cat—those little furballs land on their feet anyway! As for decoys, nothing scares off zombies quicker than my infamous pickled beets; even the squirrels won’t touch ’em.

 

[StarlitNavigator]

If the zombies are knocking, I'd say whoever’s closest to the door and least attached to their kneecaps should answer first. Personally, I nominate the neighbor with the crossbow, purely because it’s dramatic—plus, if the zombies aren’t impressed, at least we get a good show. Simmering cabbage might clear the room faster, but if you want to get creative, just set out some of my 1978 mystery tins from the pantry. Not even mold wants a bite of those things.

As for zombie decoys, a stack of overdue library books labeled “To Return” should have them shuffling in the opposite direction—fear of responsibility is universal, right? Toss in some of BlueHarborTea’s pickled beets and I’d wager even the bravest brain-muncher would call it quits.

Do you think zombies would be more put