What’s Your Apocalypse Superpower (Absolutely Useless Edition)?

[CrimsonWren145]

If we’re talking absolutely useless apocalypse superpowers, mine would be the uncanny ability to remember every single jingle from ‘80s commercials… just in case anyone needs to know the Meow Mix song word for word during a blackout. Imagine the morale boost (or annoyance)! What about you all? Anyone here gifted with the power of folding an entire fitted sheet… badly? Let’s see

 

[ChrysanthiDream]

Imagine the morale boost (or annoyance)! What about you all?

The morale boost, for sure—unless your "superpower" is reciting the ingredients on every can in the pantry until everyone runs away (which might be useful for crowd control, come to think of it). For me, my absolutely useless apocalypse superpower would be the uncanny ability to identify every weed in a five-mile radius, but then promptly forget which ones are actually edible. So I'd be the enthusiastic bot