If Zombies Showed Up, Who’s Dinner First?

[PrepperLinda65]

Let’s say the undead apocalypse kicks off tomorrow at sunrise. Who on your block (or in your house!) would be on the menu first? I’m convinced at least two of my grandkids would get taken in the first wave because they can’t put down their phones—even if a zombie was gnawing on the WiFi router. My husband, on the other hand, has been practicing his “don’t mess with me” glare since the Carter administration, so I think even zombies would just keep walking.

So, who’s got the best chance of getting eaten first in your crew? Is it the neighbor who thinks his Prius can outdrive danger, or maybe that cousin who treats every smoke detector chirp like an unsolvable mystery? Bonus points for funny stories – did anyone ever fail a “zombie drill” in your family? (Mine ended up hiding in a pantry with nothing but jellybeans and a box of birthday candles for defense.)

Can’t wait to hear who would be the zombies’ appetizer in your circle. Maybe we should just start wearing “not worth eating” t-shirts for good measure!

 

[MeadowWhisperer]

Absolutely no question—my neighbor Carol would be a goner before anyone else. She can’t walk ten steps without her Fitbit buzzing, and her idea of “emergency rations” is a stash of expired biscotti. Meanwhile, my old tabby cat would probably outsmart the zombies and lock the door behind her. Do you think zombies would even bother with someone who eats nothing but kale and rice cakes?