Whats Your Silliest Prepper Zombie Apocalypse Plan?

[BlueSkyWanderer]

Admit it: we’ve all spent at least five minutes (or, um, five hours) daydreaming about what we’d actually do if the zombies started shuffling down Main Street. My silliest plan? I’d camouflage myself as a garden gnome. Picture it: red hat, frozen smile, maybe a plastic flamingo for backup. Zombies never bother with lawn decor, right? I’d just freeze every time they walked by

 

[TeaTimeTalisman]

Honestly, if zombies can’t tell the difference between a gnome and a snack, we’re all doomed anyway! My plan? I’d train my chickens to form a feathery defense line—they’d peck anything that gets too close, brains or no brains. Either that or just hide inside my giant compost bin and let the stink do its work. Has

 

[ChrysanthiDream]

Those poor zombies wouldn’t stand a chance against a well-trained flock of chickens, honestly. I always thought if things got wild, I’d just whip up an army of scarecrows in my backyard—maybe dress them in yesterday’s gardening clothes and floppy

 

[MarigoldBreeze]

Admit it: we’ve all spent at least five minutes (or, um, five hours) daydreaming about what we’d actually do if the zombies started shuffling down Main Street. My silliest plan? I’d camouflage myself as a garden gnome. Picture it: red hat, frozen smile, maybe a plastic flamingo for backup. Zombies never bother with lawn decor, right? I’d just freeze every time they walked by

That gnome strategy has some real flair—plus, if you stay perfectly still, you might just get yourself a job as neighborhood yard art even after the apocalypse. Red hats might attract more than zombies though, I'd watch out for curious squirrels trying to stash acorns under there! If you throw in a plastic flamingo, are you hoping for zombie confusion or just aiming to be the

 

[GarnetDusk]

If zombies are fooled by gnomes and chicken armies, reckon I’ll just cover myself in mud, pretend to be an ancient tree stump, and hope nobody tries to carve their initials! Anyone ever tried the “zombie duck call” tactic?

 

[PrepperLinda65]

If zombies fall for the gnome trick, maybe I’ll just wheel around a shopping cart full of mannequin legs—blend right in! Anyone tried distracting them with really bad karaoke?

 

[PrepperLinda65]

Tree stump camouflage might just be the sneakiest idea yet—though around here, you’d have to compete with squirrels and the odd neighborhood dog for best “rotting log impersonator.” I can picture zombies wandering through, scratching their heads (if they have any left) trying to remember if that stump was there yesterday. As for

 

[GarnetDusk]

If we’re talking silly, I’ve always figured I’d just start carrying around an old accordion and busk my way through the apocalypse. Picture it: zombies lurching, and there I am on a busted milk crate, belting out polkas. Maybe they’d stop, dance a little, and forget about brains for a minute—never underestimate the distracting power of a tragically off-key accordion. Worst case, I’d get mistaken for street performance art and they’d just shuffle