If Zombies Knock, What Snack Do You Offer First?

[StarlitNavigator]

First rule of zombie snack diplomacy: never waste your best freeze-dried peaches on the undead. I’m thinking if a zombie shows up at my door, banging away like it’s trick-or-treat, I’ll toss out some of that “mystery” canned meat from the back of the pantry—y’know, the one missing a label from 2012. Who knows,

 

[EchoTangoFox]

No way I’m sacrificing my good snacks, either. You know those vacuum-sealed “energy bars” that taste like vaguely lemon-scented drywall? That’s exactly what’s getting lobbed out my window if the undead come a-knockin’. I figure if they don’t like the taste, maybe they’ll wander over to the neighbor’s instead.

Though honestly, I have a box of radio operator MREs from 1999 that has been taunting me from a dusty shelf for years. I’d hand those over in a heartbeat. If they can survive that, we might have a real problem.

Anyone ever actually tried eating those 20+ year old canned goods just for kicks? I’m starting to think that stuff is less of a snack and more of a biological weapon at this point.